The Life Of A Nomad

Every time I have to go back to school I get so incredibly irritated.  I am past the point of being excited to be on my own and to move back and forth from one place to another.  I am not meant for this nomadic life.  I wish more than anything to just be settled down. 

I get so frustrated that I get to one place, get settled, and comfortable only to have to leave in what feels like an instant.  I try my best to be happy and live in the moment; it is something I am working on, but I am just not good at it. 

I am so nervous to be back in Albuquerque.  I have no idea what to expect in my new classes.  I hate that my brother does not live in the same complex anymore.  These things and more cause so much anxiety for me and I hate it. 


I am the type of person who needs to know what to expect.  I have a hard time with the unexpected.  I have one professor who has already e-mailed us with seven attachments to print out and instructions to get a 4 GB USB and put everything on it before class.  This, while incredibly insane, eases my mind because at least I know what to expect.

If I don't have class on the 5th, which I still don't know, I will be going to Oklahoma with Kyle and his parents to see OU play Texas.  The fact that I have no clue which Friday's I will have class extremely bothers me.   Mostly because I can't plan, but also because I think it is incredibly inconvenient of the professor to have not informed us yet.

I have no idea if I am supposed to be student teaching this Thursday.  There has been no instruction on that as well.  I feel like I have to jump through hoops to find out what on earth I am supposed to be doing. 

I will be so happy and relaxed when I finally am able to settle, be in one place (except for vacation), have one job, one routine, and be around the people I love the most. 

I think I need to be talking to the man upstairs a lot more, because I only foresee this becoming more and more frustrating in the upcoming week and I know only he can give me a tangible peace. 


God,

I come to you today for a calmness that I know only you can provide.  I pray you ease my anxiety and worry about this first week of school.  I pray that in everything I do, I will be able to glorify you.  I pray for peace in my apartment alone.  I pray for discipline with the new changes I am about to face and I pray for doors to open with new people and a support group.  I love you and I thank you for the many wonderful blessings you have place in my life.  I thank you for the family and friends I am surrounded by and the difficulty I face when knowing I have to leave them.  You are so much bigger than my problems, worries, and frustrations, so I ask you to take them into your hands and do what you will with them.  I love you.

In your name I pray,

Amen.